as mewling rats, blinded by the wingspan of the owl deafened by the pulse of the hour quickened, the limbs respond by disconnecting from the body I cannot hold the center, internalized the chaos inscribed upon my soul there is wisdom in dreams, but my wisdom dreams not it can't eat, it cannot sleep By refusing to play the game, I will not accept defeat and yet expect… victory my just reward for sheathing the sword for ceding the ground no share of blood desired so, in the flood submerged and strangled til the face of god is manifest beaten into beauty torture birthing faith the will of man’s – unconscious - is desire without chains the greatest man reduced and therefore known without the fame the greatest lives are fragments which are born but never named they are born but never named they are born but never named they are born but never named they are born

To dream is to lie in wait – to sleep is to suffocate to wake – the mourners go, today - is far too late To grow, is to grow to accept that nothing’s as big as it used to be It’s not much fun but you learn to accept failure’s part in this five-part harmony To find is to create anew, so fine as the original Design - set the blueprint to flame, you’re not to blame, it’s never you I did right by you, blinding myself and walking right by you Denying that this misery was a symptom of a mastermind Whether you are man or state, to rape is to initiate Will it turn you on when the sigh in your ears are bullets whizzing past your head She’s dead but you don’t know it yet, her candle’s lit, her candle’s lit See the ocean, sink or swim, in a fabric that’s been worn too thin Torn between the choices sold by sick, sadistic voices, there lies (their lies) the greatest story ever told – learning to love crap equals happy soul So Let’s All Eat Shit and Die So Let’s All Eat Shit and Die So Let’s All Eat Shit and Die

Fiend – intrigue and possess me – take possession of this fragile synthesis Believe – have faith that my uselessness – will sustain me til their eyes are torn away Crawl at their feet, scraping my knees, humbling myself before their rotten piety Jump to my feet, praise them by name, make myself unto them, a devoted charade Once dedicated to life half-full and thirsty for the taste of each morning’s dew (do) If you’re damned by the shake of the snake, lottery balls bounce round shaking up my rib-cage The nauseating feeling of growing older by the minute is devouring our hours and then coming back for seconds so time my collapse, synchronize your watches and remember to tell them all I tried my best Stars – guide this depression – alien worshipers unite and dethrone the king Lord of his manor – prim and proper with a mouthful of honeybees Stinging his gums, the sweetest honeyed blood – suckled by a child of sickly pallor This ghost haunts his soul, his sole possession He tries to hide his eyes to behold the end begin Turning for relief in his burial mound, his retching misery sets the children ablaze The sound of burning lambs and the smell that they make Pervade this perverse palace where only jesters speak the truth In tangled tongues, strangled love, struggles to breath The approximate arrival of the meta-spiritual cure Will have us bathing lepers in formaldehyde Swearing all the while we told the truth I'm cruising at one hundred and five – Porky squeals “pull over” but I couldn’t abide I took that fat fuck for a ride – I don’t think he’ll just let this slide I'm cruising at one hundred and five – Porky squeals “pull over” but I couldn’t abide I took that fat fuck for a ride – I don’t think he’ll just let this slide I'm cruising at one hundred and five – Porky squeals “pull over” but I couldn’t abide I took that fat fuck for a ride – I don’t think he’ll just let this slide I guess I wasn’t thinking at all…

It’s not your imagination, it’s not that you love your chains it’s not for lack of self-identification with the martyr, it’s not that you don’t feel his pain Cause dreams cannot save us all – our hearts are closed when our eyes are open Dreams cannot save us all Your dreams cannot save us all – our hearts are closed when our eyes are open Dreams cannot save us all Reality holds supremacy over serenity in conflict - never peace it’s only when we turn our backs – on the impossible a balance may be reached Cause dreams cannot save us all – our hearts are closed when our eyes are open Dreams cannot save us all Your dreams cannot save us all – our hearts are closed when our eyes are open Dreams cannot save us all I’ve heard your voices, I’ve seen your visions your soul is willing but your body is frail I’ve studied your plans, I’ve tagged along on all your missions and I’ll cry with you every time that each one of them fails Is this the triumph of pessimism the sum result of an emotionless decay of age maybe it’s just me and not the way of this world (weight of this world) but if that’s true why do you look so afraid – every time I say Dreams cannot save us all – our hearts are closed when our eyes are open Dreams cannot save us all You dreams cannot save us – our hearts are closed when our eyes are open Your dreams cannot save us all

So suddenly it came, before we realized, that something was wrong, our problems arise our stalemating game, our feet to the flame, flicker-licking our toes, the heat overcame combustion was imminent, nerve-wracking isn’t it, strange that we find ourselves slaves to the hell we created, emotionally unstable like particles fused by mad scientists, bent on the spectacle like soul-mates eternal with hate in our eyes, the heat overcame, made more problems arise we stared, sweating tensions emboldened our fists, when push comes to shove we can hardly resist the temptation that tempts us, the illusion that eludes the foundation we’re based on, shifts with our moods, tossed by the rapids, til we’re wrecked on the rocks, cursing our tools, reeling from shock it's this fear which astounds us, intoxicated, by a shot of adrenaline with only bile to chase it champing our bit, we grin eating shit, with a shit-eating grin in a champ-biting fit oh no!

As we came to the conclusion that we were born again too late The sun frowned upon us disapproving What if the fruit of knowledge was best left rotting on the vine By this time, how would we measure? And where were you when I was falling from the sky? Mouth agape - miles away – with nothing left to do and nothing left to say… but going down? I went hurtling through the multi-verse – turned the corner on desire and Painted my face with shades of loudest yellows and roundest reds Pulled myself through then burnt out from the effort and now the fragments are falling from the sky It will make a place for itself, where none has existed before, leaving a scar on the facade And you and I will be left, counting the days, with nothing left to do and nothing left to say… …but going down?

No time like the present, I hope that the future feels different Yesterday leaves stains, we call these memories and though we bathe in tomorrow we are never clean How little we sell ourselves for, so few know what they're worth Control is not a birth right, it's earned, and believe me Those who deserve it never get it, they give but don't receive And they tell themselves that's life and thus are both deceiver and deceived And those who have it didn't earn it, but nor will they concede And they tell themselves that’s just - as such they’re just as much deceiver… deceiver as deceived Deceiver – deceiver and deceived Deceiver – deceiver and deceived Deceiver – deceiver and deceived Deceiver…Deceiver Deceiver…Deceiver Deceiver…Deceiver Deceiver…Deceiver Deceiver…Deceiver and deceived

As the sky… Opened up its eyes to cry, the rain came down for days Spent in oblivion – I lay awake and recreate Diversion haunts this house of cards, plagued this state of mass confusion, digging ditches and graves She teases the horizon, until it backs away Backed into corners, joined, like shadow at two distant points The quickest way around, we tremble at the river’s sound, the rushing water drowned My love for higher ground At the banks of the universe, we dip one foot at a time Some fear they see the abyss – I close my eyes and dive Trying to breathe in – this vacant breeze The wind whistles familiar songs, I try to sing but nothing comes across… I will… See you on the other side, let my slit wrists come to rest Up your shoulders down, smear my blood across your breasts I’ll beg if you want me to…. no greater dignity Then to worship you from afar – I’ll get down on my knees And pray to this deity, who’s still ignoring me her thundering laugh – as she reads my epitaph Then lightning struck a branch, which fell ‘cross the divide and I could see her arms, and they were open wide I run from acceptance fast, I fear the precipice Though I always told myself I’d cross that bridge when I came to it Instead I walked away, the rain came on for days spent in oblivion, I lay awake and re-create

Can you believe? Can you believe? Can you ever truly know or are you always deceived? Did you find the lies made you cry? Or were you blind to the fact that as promises are broken, wounds are opened? Can you commit? Or will you submit? Are you ready, willing, eager or are you just sick of this shit? Did you think what I thought of you had nothing to do with someone confused by all the abuse! And I can’t help you – can’t tell you a thing that you didn’t already know – that you didn’t already think And I don’t care to – don’t care what you’ve done you can’t catch me – you’ll just watch me run Follow blindly – love is fleeting, true but you’re chasing a ghost – if you only knew This delusion we share, we sail through the air, bottle the message and pray it might reach (I hope it might teach you that the) Shades of such anger, the pointlessness of the proving ground revealed in the champions flaws – which are many (we strive at the sun, shattered realms) Of deceit and thievery, pages of poetry in flames kept us warm and content (as the hate which once was love now motivates) In public we silently condemn the masquerade while donning the mask and calling it self (crying for love, shrinking from touch) Begging for change, maintaining the same mistakes, the flaws in the foundation revealed for a moment Then concealed forever! Can you reflect? Can you detect? That in every damned deflection, it’s your voice that projects Cause your excuses are old and useless and if you only knew, I’d still say fuck you man

How dare you? Tell me not to smile? If the very idea of joy offends you, then stay and retch awhile I can show you my pain – I can feed you my fear – until it’s hard to breathe My litany of mistakes – does it make you salivate? You make me want to toll this bell until it cracks Liberating me, from your selfish need, to share my lack of faith Not this time – Not this me – Not this time And I don’t just say the wrong things – I tend to scream them from the top of my lungs Must I spew hate to convince you, that we’re all free to be bleeding need Here: solace for the seeker – turn it up and come alive, come alive I’m just a fellow traveler – in this tunnel at the end of the light Regrets I’ve had a few too many in this life of crime There’s no need to overstate the obvious – but I ain’t feelin’ fine As a matter of fact – I ain’t feelin’ this room, I ain’t feeling much at all Why presume to love – you’d all much rather push and shove Why bother to share how numb we’ve become? Comfortably glum – Come and feel up my pain I can no longer reap this bitter harvest so I’m going against the grain. And I don’t just say the wrong things – I tend to scream them from the top of my lungs Must I spew hate to convince you, that we’re all free to be bleeding need Here: solace for the seeker – turn it up and come alive, come alive I’m just your fellow traveler – in this tunnel at the end of the light

Simmer down young warriors now Keep the flames at bay Gather round - for its a lovely sound Which our companionship creates Out of this pain - free from the hate We came to an understanding That in this place - even the ugliest face Can smile – laughing away the Shame that defines us on the outside – our jobs, our homes But here I don't have to know your names To know that I am not alone And out from this all springs hope infernal A deviant delight We enter through the evening And exit to the night Nothing I do can save me now Nothing I say will matter Oh how I wish there was something that I could say But there isn't. So, anyway I guess this was fun while it lasted And we'll always have these memories To hold onto – yearn for Revisit – restore Like the scent of freshness Of dew on the leaves My hope springing infernal Whipping wind through the trees But what I really need now Can't be found in a past Which only echoes a dream Which in shadows was cast Throughout the whole of my life There's been no turning back And now there's only moving forth towards that light And it's beautiful But it's not what I want at all Not what I had in mind And it's not like I really care Cause it's not that I even tried Cause this is not what I want at all This is not what I had in mind

Have we gone too far, have we crossed the line? It seems we do the same things every night We tell the same dumb jokes, recite the same bad lines We fuck the same sad girls and pick the same damn fights And every day mobility is sacrificed to stability And when sterility comes, we’re breeding fear We lay paralyzed under the harsh red light Which soothes me, light which bathes me Light which welcomes me into its arms like a baby Love is only what it used to be – sorry But that’s what it is, it’s alright - don’t worry I’m not going anywhere soon I’m not going anywhere yet And I don’t wanna move, I don’t have to prove Nothing to no one, I’ve got nothing to lose I’ve worn the same damned rags for the last forty days I’ve got a big damn boat – in my bones, I feel it’s about to rain Assembled my crew – two by two God said “Let there be some” And I’m blessed to be part of the few Who groove